Joy!

This adoption road is one filled with more twists, turns bumps and potholes than we could have ever imagined. What a journey of faith and growth. I have grown within myself and Bob and I have grown within our commitment to marriage and family. What began as a desire for me to experience a daughter in our family has morphed into so much more. We now understand that we have been lead to adopt not only as a way of adding another child to our family but as a way to reach out to the world. We want to be a beacon of light in a world filled with so much despair. Now it is important to clarify that we are not righteous and saintly. We are instead somewhat selfish and needy in our desire to "have the girl." It is certainly a strange contradiction but one we know we will understand when we are meant to. 

All the research and dialogue needed to go through this process has brought me closer to so many people. I am closer to my children and have been able to show them the bigger picture of the tremendous need in the world. I am closer to my sisters. They have listened to me rationalize this and explain that. They have watched as we danced around the million signs that screamed ETHIOPIA all along. Funny how God can place the answer directly in front of us and sometimes we simply chose to ignore it. Finally it was Haven who said a few weeks back, "Mel, I do not mean to be rude but you always talk about Ethiopia and the orphanage there that is run by your agency (Hannah's Hope) and all the hassle free adoptions and healthy children.... Why don't you just switch to the Ethiopia program?" I mean for real? Then there were the months of following the Adopt Nepal group online and hearing all the stories of the moving target that the Nepal program has become. Everything seems to be changing constantly within the very poor land of Nepal. There is no one to blame but we started to rethink our decision. Yes it is possible that Nepal is where we were meant to be but should the process be so difficult and should we really be expected to travel to Nepal for up to a month when we have three young people here are home who need us too? It was all becoming very overwhelming. To top it all off there is now a new government trying to get their act together and it could be months before we see even the very first adoptions completed.

 So back to where this thought began... I am now closer to friends and other families who have adopted and by far I am closer to Bob who has been a rock through this journey. I see it as a true miracle that his heart became one with my heart in the hope to adopt a child. It has been amazing that he thinks exactly what I am thinking and I can do it no better justice than to define it as becoming one. We have shared so many tears and so many conversations that have caused us to dig deep in understanding where this desire comes from. For me it is not rocket science. I have experienced great loss and abandonment. I have a unique perspective that I hope will help me love a child who has been abandoned. I was left behind in several respects by mothers who could not put their children first. But by the grace of God I am able to see the "flip side." There have been so many times in my life that I was carried by those who adopted me into their worlds. From my Dad, having to do so much more than he was meant to shoulder to the Young Life leaders in high school, to the generous and loving Addison family to God himself reeling me in... I have been adopted and nurtured in ways that have brought me safely to where I am today.  So this adoption is truly about so much more!

We are thrilled today to know that we will be changing gears. We will be moving forward and not looking back. As both Bob and I discussed last night, we will be praying hard that adoptions in Nepal move much more quickly, that Nepali children find forever families. We will pray that the many childless couples who have strived for so long to adopt from Nepal to Vietnam to Guatemala find some peace in the process. We will be praying that All God's Children will be helpful and fair in guiding us toward Ethiopia. I have loved the country of Ethiopia and the program ever since I started researching it several years ago. I cannot wait to see who God has planned for our family. There will be one less child growing up without a family to love her forever.